Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Stats, I Got Em---and I'm not afraid to use em

Statistics are easy to come by. There are a whole slew of places that will for free advise you how many visitors are checking out your blog, and you too can be razzle dazzled with stats, visitors, yesterday, today , expected tomorrow, page views, where did they start, and what page did they exit from----(imagine in the background the song from "Damn Yankees" playing in the background "You Gotta Have Heart"-------Stats can be exhilarating, they can be boring they can be down right cruel---and if used properly can prove any side of any and every argument on any and every issue. (its all in the delivery---ya gotta--" Razzle Dazzle Em"---which you all know is a song from the Broadway show "Chicago".
What I am kinda talking about is---who is and who isn't reading my blog--even more important--how come more people aren't reading it?---Maybe I need a new bar to do my preaching in?---maybe I need a better business manager (wait I am my own business mgr)---MAYBE I just need better PR ?(Whats PR? , the blond asks innocently as she licks her ice cream cone----who brought her to the party anyway?)
I know "Rome wasn't built in a day"---and its only been what??---three months since we started this thing?----still it occurs to me that not that many people come to this area---and pretty damn sure the chamber of commerce ain't exactly promoting us----(damn how do I meet anybody on the Chamber of Commerce?) I'm blogging my brains out here-----and nothing?? you sure this is how Bob Hope got started? (the blond all smiles, "Whose Bob Hope?"---somebody sees the look in my eyes and removes her from my line of vision).
Seriously folks---just how DOES one get discovered these days---seems like 98% of people have camera/phones, then there are all those cameras mounted at intersections, all the ATMS----wow---just a matter of time before the Old Dude here gets the call huh----huh? what?? Johnny Carson isn't on TV anymore??----hey I don't DO "impersonations" and I expect my own dressing room----you tell em that okay??

7 comments:

  1. You been living in the LA area for how long? You should know the secret by now.

    What you do is find a soda fountain somewhere, go in, order up the Sundae of your choice and wait. And Wait. And Wait. And then wait some more. Eventually you will be discovered. Either for that special look like whats her face had or after eating so many Sundaes, you will become news worthy because they had to call in a crane to get your fat butt out of there.

    Remember - There is no such thing as bad publicity.

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  2. Gary, man you gotta relax, it will happen

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  3. You have figured it out. You have to read and comment to let other bloggers know you are here. Thanks for visiting my blog and putting me in your list. I'll be catching up on your posts.

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  4. Watching jeopardy last night one of the contestants is a soap opera fanatic and blogs about soaps. He gets about 17,000 hits a day. Lots of soap freaks out there. I personally think you should have a political blog site. Its getting hot out there and we need more people out there helping out our cause. I am getting depressed thinking about this young inexperienced radical as our next president. His character is so flawed with the company he has kept, only 143 days in the senate, wants to destroy all the work we have accomplished in Iraq, raise taxes, open up the borders and basically turn our country into a fascist one. We are not too far away from that now with the government telling us more and more what we can and can't do. There you go, I can't stay away from politics.
    Tish

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  6. Well Gary you could rent a limo put on a dress with no undies and let it leak that a big star will be at Grauman's chinese theater. That might work.

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  7. You have six comments- Seven now. Um that is not nothing. Seesh!

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Speak up, don't be a nebish---your opinions do count.